Ruby Rippey, the ex-wife of Alex Tourk, broke decades of silence on her affair with Gavin Newsom in a detailed Vanity Fair essay published Tuesday, offering the first extensive first-person account of the scandal that rocked San Francisco politics more than twenty years ago.
In the essay titled “How I Blew Up—Then Rebuilt—My Life,” Rippey describes the monthslong affair that unfolded in 2005 and 2006 when she worked as Newsom’s appointments secretary while he was the city’s mayor. Rippey was married to Tourk, who served as Newsom’s deputy chief of staff and later campaign manager, making the affair a betrayal of both professional and personal trust within the mayor’s inner circle.
Rippey recounts the affair beginning at a wedding over the Fourth of July weekend in 2005, when she and Newsom found themselves alone in a hallway outside a bathroom. She describes the escalating relationship as driven by alcohol and the intoxication of proximity to power rather than genuine romance. “It isn’t love. It isn’t romance. It’s intoxication,” she writes, explaining how she manufactured reasons to be near Newsom, scanning his calendar for openings and positioning herself within his sight line at City Hall.
Rippey details her struggle with alcoholism throughout the affair, noting that she began measuring her days by how close it was to five o’clock, when she could start drinking. She describes the relationship as fueled by intoxication on both sides, with encounters occurring at Newsom’s Russian Hill penthouse, private back rooms in North Beach bars, and hotels in Los Angeles.
The affair came to light when Rippey entered rehab to address her drinking. In rehab, her therapist recommended she not tell her husband about the affair, fearing the public fallout could threaten her recovery. However, Rippey determined it was necessary to confess. According to the essay, she told Tourk directly about the infidelity in January 2007, months after the affair had ended when she sent Newsom a resignation letter and breakup letter in May 2006.
After learning of the affair from his wife, Tourk confronted Newsom and resigned from his position on January 31, 2007. Newsom subsequently held a news conference acknowledging the affair, stating “Everything you’ve read is true and I’m deeply sorry.” The revelation shocked San Francisco residents and California political circles, despite Newsom being single at the time—he had separated from Kimberly Guilfoyle.
In her essay, Rippey also reveals that she sought advice from Kamala Harris, then the San Francisco District Attorney, about whether to speak publicly about the scandal. Harris, whom Rippey knew from working in City Hall, advised her to remain silent. According to Rippey’s account, Harris told her: “I wouldn’t say anything right now, Ruby. Just pause. More time will give you better perspective.” Rippey credits this as the best advice she received at the time.
The essay also disputes elements of Newsom’s own account in his memoir. Rippey describes the early days of Newsom’s administration as a young, charismatic mayor building something new, with herself and Tourk as part of that effort. She reflects on how the affair unraveled not only her marriage but also her career and sense of self, ultimately leading her to rebuild her life in recovery.
Sources
- Vanity Fair — Ruby Rippey’s first-person essay detailing the affair, her alcoholism, the timeline, and Kamala Harris’s advice
- CNN, ABC News, New York Times, The Guardian — Confirmation of the essay’s publication, the affair timeline (2005-2006), Tourk’s resignation on January 31, 2007, and Newsom’s public acknowledgment
- LA Times, NBC News — Details of Rippey’s confession to Tourk and the affair’s impact on San Francisco politics
- Fox News, The Hill, People Magazine — Reporting on Kamala Harris’s advice to Rippey and details of the scandal’s fallout
- Politico, Sacramento Bee, SF Chronicle — Coverage of contradictions between Rippey’s account and Newsom’s memoir, and the scandal’s political context
